An Open Letter to My Freshman Year

Dear 3 AM,

Isn’t it funny, that you can go 18 years of your life feeling like you have it all figured out, just to find out you still don’t remember how to do your own laundry? And this is only the beginning.

Eight months ago, worries of what people might think would have kept me from putting my thoughts out for all who knew me. Today, I realize you do these things for you and not for anyone else. So here I am writing a letter, and somehow finding myself in the process.

In my first year of college, I truly realized how little I had come and how far I have to go. Leaving home for the first time eight months ago, set me out on a journey that I could have never imagined. That journey has been complicated, confusing and one heck of an adventure. This year, I have grown immensely in my understanding of myself and the chaotic life that surrounds me. These lessons have guided my freshman year and have turned in to persistent reminders on surviving life on my (almost) own.

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The friendships I have gained and lost in the past eight months have showed me the real blessings of the people God bestows in our journey.

To the friendships that have been lost: Remember that God has a plan and that people are truly sent into your life when you need them most and leave when their purpose is fulfilled. If your life is anything similar to mine, you will feel the absence of so many people who use to be your whole world. When you feel this absence, remember that they may just have finished their part of your story and be moving on to the next chapter of their life. Let them go, let them find their next chapter, let them become a better them, let them be great.

This lesson of letting go will be one of the biggest struggles that you will ever endure during your freshman year. You will feel like you know what’s best and that the advice of letting go is for everyone but you. You would refuse to accept the change and fight for these people to remain in your life.

One of the greatest lessons that you will ever learn is that if you actually care about these people, let them go. Let them go be great, let them grow on their own, and let them find themselves. Pray for them and be proud of them. Realize that you were blessed to know them and witness the beginning of their great life. Watch as they soar, and know you were a part of a chapter that got them to where they are today. Let that be enough.

To the gained friendships: This is what college is about (besides school, of course). Freshman year is the year you will gain the most wonderful and unique friendships in the world. You will make an abundance of those “friends for life” and you will be happier than ever to have them by your side. You will be severely confused on how you survived your first 18 years without them, and not so casually let them know that they are stuck with you for the next 60 years.

You will have your roommate who if you’re as lucky as I was, will become a best friend, your family, and the person you spend countless hours enjoying and accepting the severe Netflix addiction you both suffer from.

You will have Greek involved friends and not so Greek involved friends that will equally impact your life in all different ways.

You will have your much-needed classmate friends who will sometimes be the only reason you pass a class — be extra thankful for them, because they just took one for the team.

You will have your life of the party friends or as I like to call them “Meredith and Molly”, who will never let you forget that college is about having a good time and seizing every opportunity thrown your way.

No matter the assortment of friends you will inevitably make, you should know they are the glue to your college experience. Don’t be afraid to tell them their importance and never to let them forget how thankful you are for their existence. They rock, and they should know it.

Beyond the blessing of friendship, you will also ultimately realize the overwhelming importance of your parents.

As a freshman, you will discover that the people you couldn’t wait to not have bossing you around, are actually your rock and biggest fans. The countless hours you spent under-appreciating them will now have you spending the rest of your life letting them know how much you value and appreciate their support.

With a new found respect and appreciation of your parents, you can quite possibly make the greatest friends in the world in them. The friendship you bestow in your parents is the most genuine, empowering, and beautiful thing in the world that God gives us on earth. Sadly, it takes most of us 18 years to discover the true greatness of this friendship. With first-hand experience of having parents who have grown into my best friends, I can promise you that there is nothing more fulfilling.

In the past year, I transitioned from the daughter who all who knew me thought I would never call home, to a daughter that my parents hear from daily. These phone calls encompass some of the greatest advice, laughter, and love that I have ever experienced. Whether you’re having a rough day, a great day or even just running low on the summer cash that was supposed to last you all year, the phone call home will always be beneficial. No one on earth knows you better than the people that brought you here, so be thankful for them, and happy God gave you such a fantastic pair of built-in friends.

Freshman year is tough, yet amazing, and your biggest fans want nothing more than to know all about it, so don’t hesitate to share. Don’t take these guys for granted, they’re the most important people God has given you.

Lastly, if there were anything in the world that I could have engraved in my mind during these past eight months, it would be to love yourself unconditionally and never to forget to see your self-worth. When you begin a new journey and lose your comfort zone in a matter of seconds, your self-love is truly tested.

This is the time you should remind yourself that no matter what is happening in your life, loving yourself and seeing your value should always be first and foremost.

If you are anything like myself, you struggle with this concept and seeing the truth in those words on an almost daily basis. You constantly compare yourself to the skinnier, the prettier, and more talented people around you. These comparisons are nothing but a warped perception of judgments you make and have no serious meaning to anyone but you. In these moments, don’t lose sight of your great attributes. God gave you this life, body, and characteristics for a purpose, and we all should take pride in his work and not devalue oneself from a skewed perception in our head.

Loving oneself is a constant battle that requires constant effort and endless do-overs. I would tell myself to not let others define your value and always to stand up for the things that matter to you. You are in charge of loving yourself, and no one can or should be in charge of creating a value to you. In the end, freshman year is tough, and you must always fight to believe in yourself. You must not forget to love yourself as much as you love others.

This year doesn’t define who you will always be, but it’s a beginning of a great journey. Your journey isn’t always going to be easy, and in those not so easy moments you must remember to have confidence in yourself. As long as you have confidence, you will always be able to overcome the day on top. So remind yourself that you got this, and you’re killing it on your (almost) own.

To wrap up this never-ending, yet essential letter I have written to not only you, but also myself, I ask that we remember that this is just the beginning. You have only just begun this journey, and you have all the power in the world to make it the most beautiful, unique and impactful adventure. God has given you everything in his possible power to succeed and sore. Take advantage of the blessings of friendship, the great parents you have, and the value in yourself that he has bestowed in your life.

Laugh a lot, cry a little, and continue to make the memories of a lifetime. Always choose to live by your rules, and let others live by their own. This is your time, your moment, your life, and you’re going to be great. So be proud of yourself, you’re surviving on your (almost) own for the first time in your life.

You may not realize it now, but you’re leading only a life that you can lead, and freshman year is only the beginning of your kick-ass story.

Sincerely,

4 AM & exhausted.

Georgia girls give us MAJOR closet envy

And we stalked them on Insta so you don’t have to…

Our favorite looks from the app… IRL.

Formal? Weekend plans? Date night? No worries – we gotchu.

We’re hashtag obsessed with this pastel blue- perfect for spring formals.

Shop Annie’s closet

Follow @anniemac97

Anna Beth is always rocking the hottest trends on her feed, & this Misguided dress is no exception.

Shop Anna Beth’s closet

Follow @annabethbowles

Slay every party, like Vallie does in this sequin number.

Shop Vallie’s closet

Follow @valpalz

We are LOVING the set trend- and this one is perfect for Darty Szn.

Shop Mary Holland’s closet

Follow @maryhollandnader

Navy dresses are perfect for mixing + matching fun accessories and shoes – and the slit takes this dress to a whole new level.

Shop Madison’s closet

Follow @madisonnclarkk

Want your closet to be featured next?! Send us a note at [email protected] 😘

XOXO,

Curtsy

P.S. Don’t have Curtsy?! Download the App Now.

Did I just get broken up with even when we weren’t dating?

Isn’t this a weird thing to be even writing about? 

Dating right now has got to be the most confusing thing in the world. With these so called “things” and “talking to someone” and “oh we’re just hanging out”, is anyone really even dating anymore?

It’s almost as exhausting as sitting through your hour and 15 minute class scrolling through Instagram the entire time.

Despite having it happen to me several times, I have definitely done it to guys as well and I’m sure we all have. So, oops.

This is what happens when you have the “talk” or try to “define the relationship” when there isn’t really a relationship to define. Which just to throw it out there is weird. Why do we do this? It is like taking a huge wrecking ball to a building that hasn’t even been built yet.

There is a specific time where this happened to me and putting it in to retrospect I am dumbfounded.

This guy was in the same city I was for the summer so we decided to hangout. Full disclosure here, we’ve had some pretty intense conversations and I knew we were into each other.

A guy who can communicate genuine feelings… WOW what a concept.

I got to his cute little home and we started to watch a movie. Please judge me because looking back I was digging my own grave. Also, girls we can all do better than a “movie-at-his-apartment” date which I know we’ve all been on a hundred times.

Things were pretty PG to begin with just your average cuddling and making out. But literally maybe 30 minutes into this so called “date”, he ruins it.

“Listen, I just need you to know this before things go any further.”

(First, if he just assumed things were going to go further, I will have his head.)

“I value your friendship and I wouldn’t want to mess anything up. I just want you to know I’m not really looking to date anyone right now and I don’t want to lead you on.”

Um OK. Lets take a step back. I am about to be a senior, our college towns are 9 hours away, and I’m only going to be around him for the next month. Why would I be looking for anything other than a friendly make out/hang out occasionally?

Also, why wouldn’t you want to date me?

And thanks for ruining my little fantasy of late night summer swims and having a hot guy to make out with.

ALSO, why do all guys think you want to date them? Guys who do this (& girls tbh) automatically believe that you 100% want to date them and they have a need to shut things off before they feel that way too.

Which honestly just makes me laugh because lesssbehonest most of the time boys we aren’t looking to date you either.

Regardless of the circumstances, it was flat out annoying that he ended things before they even began. And this is my point. Too many people try to define things when there isn’t anything to define. It’s like men have a huge wrecking ball in their hands at all times just in case they’ve hung out with the same girl 3 times in a row.

I’ve learned that this excuse, like any excuse really, means that guy is someone you don’t want to be with. Any excuse they give you is just a reason to reassure you that you didn’t want to date them anyways. Trust me, you deserve better. 

Drake’s God’s Plan Music Video Has Us Cryin In The Club

We didn’t think things could get any better after Drake taught us YOLO in 8th grade, but then he went and dropped God’s Plan music video just to remind us why he’s literally a legend. Seriously, never did we think we’d be cryin in the club over watching a rap video but even the hardest hearts would feel while watching Drake give away $1 million dollars.

We may all be cryin, but one thing’s for sure after watching the ‘God’s Plan’ music video, Drake’s making a comeback & we’re. all. here. for. it.  See for yourself…

https://twitter.com/officialiskie/status/964905214598926336

 

 

 

Rent, Rock, Repeat: Frankie Edition

My week as a Curtsy renter

One week renting off Curtsy? Challenge accepted, Curtsy HQ.  In case you didn’t know, it is totally possible to rent your entire wardrobe off Curtsy now. The app now offers tops and bottoms in addition to just cocktail dresses. So you’ll find new categories on the app for tops, bottoms and even two-pieces!

Disclaimer: I am no stranger to Curtsy. I’ve had more than 60 requests from my closet and 39 rentals in the past 4 semesters. I’ve made over $800 off my own clothes! Better yet, I’ve turned that money around and rented over 10 times from other girls on the app. I’m going to use all of this experience to show you how to rent like a #girlboss.

Spoiler alert: this renting escapade cost me only $80 for FOUR bomb outfits. Without Curtsy, these FOUR items would have cost me $383. That’s right, I saved $300 using Curtsy. My lifetime Curtsy savings are legit $2,005.00. Yeah, I gasped too.

Here is what my agenda looked like for this week of renting. The week featured a lot of messaging on the app, meeting up with girls at NC State, trying on clothes and my favorite part– wearing AWESOME clothes. Follow along to see how each step in the renting process works!

Sunday: search the app for potential rents

Monday: message owners about renting

Tuesday: try on Urban skirt, Zara jacket, Lauren Moshi Dress & Express two-piece

Wednesday: wear Urban skirt to V-Day din with bf

Thursday: strut stuff in two-piece at ADPi Cocktail

Friday: Look cute and casual in distressed sweater

Saturday: B-day party time rockin’ leather jacket with lace tank under

Scope out the scene

So, the app’s feed kinda looks like Pinterest. You can scroll for days. Better yet, you can “heart” anything and everything while you scroll. I try to go on the app at least once a week to heart new items so that I can keep my “loves” up to date.

This week’s agenda calls for some going out clothes and an outfit for my Valentine’s Day cocktail. With the addition of non-dresses to the app, you can rent for more than just cocktails once or twice a month. Why keep re-wearing the same tank top with the same skort every weekend when you could spice it up with Curtsy??

I found this 3/4 length sleeve leather jacket to pair with something out of my own closet and this loungey Lauren Moshi dress. I also found this adorable black and white striped skirt from Urban, and I REALLY hope it fits. When I shop, I’m way more likely to buy tops than bottoms so the many, many skirts on Curtsy keep me #blessed. Last but not least, found a red two-piece from Express for my sorority cocktail.

 

The world is my dressing room

Curtsy is like a hyper-local Revolve store, really. It’s like their website brought to your campus. I went ahead and messaged the owners of the skirt/jacket/t-shirt dress and asked if I could come by today or tomorrow to try them on. Two girls said they’d be home tonight for me to try on, and I’m snagging the jacket from Hope while’s she at the library studying for her test. It’s like Curtsy to-go???!

The good thing about trying on is you don’t have a time frame where you’re in crunch time trying not to get charged. I didn’t start the try-on period until I was at the house trying on the skirt. If it works, you pay. If not, you don’t.

Trying on clothes is sometimes a swing and a miss. Curtsy understands those strike-outs and only charges you when you find that home run piece.

 

To commit, or not to commit

This skirt fit like a glove. I mean really… I don’t think my own skirts fit me this well. Shout out to you, Kelsey!! Since it fit, I went on the app and paid her right there, it was really easy.

After I left there, I went to try on the t-shirt dress. I couldn’t help but laugh at how I looked in it. It is SO CUTE in pictures, but I really looked like I was omw to a sleepover in it. Maybe next time 🙁 Bella is such a good friend, she’s in the pic with me. She took some shots of me trying on clothes and agreed that this was not a good look for me this weekend, or ever.

I didn’t have to pay for the dress since it didn’t fit. The app doesn’t automatically charge you anymore! Lucky me, Rachel has literally ALL of her closet on Curtsy so I went through and found something else of hers to rent– super cute sweater as seen up top.

Strike a pose, woman

I totally get made fun of for tagging Curtsy in all of my pictures, but I’m really hoping I get re-posted some day… persistence is key, ya know? And when people ask you where you got your outfit, always tell them Curtsy!! Nothing like making someone feel silly for paying full price for a dress that’s on the app for $20.

Even more reason to strike a pose… look at these savings.

Urban Outfitters skirt – $60, rent for $14

Express two-piece – $90, rent for $18

Zara leather jacket – $60, rent for $15

Lauren Moshi sweater – $173, rent for $30

Doesn’t this leave you wondering why you ever go shopping?

The morning after

The post-wear steps are a lot easier than you think. On Sunday, I messaged the owners on the app and asked them when I could bring by their clothes. I’m not a huge drink-spiller so I didn’t need to get anything dry cleaned, phew. But if you do, it’s really no biggie. Curtsy insures each item up to $1,000, so they’ll pay for minor damages in case something happens while you’re wearing it!

Don’t forget to make it official. I’m so bad at this, but try to be better than me. When I say official, I mean make sure you mark the item as returned on the app. You could get charged a late fee if you don’t return it in time! It will also ask you to review your experience, and ALWAYS upload pics of you in the clothing if you took any! It’s so helpful for other potential renters to see how the skirt fits or how the dress hangs. Help a sista out.

Bask in the Curtsy glow

Now, go tell your friends about Curtsy. Brag about how you wore a $300 dress for $20. Show them how great you looked without breaking the bank. Never spend that much money again, and look flawless while you do it. While you’re at it, let me help you bask in the Curtsy glow. Thanks for renting along with me! Use FRANKIE15 for 15% off your next Curtsy rental! Follow me @frankiebmiller on the ‘gram to see how I wear Curtsy each week!

Leather jacket at Mash’s bday party!

 

 

Woke Up As The Real Life Hannah Montana, An HQ Autobiography

 

 

Hannah Montana once said “Who would of thought that a girl like me would double as a superstaaaaarrrrrrrrr?” and while I may not be doubling as a superstar, I am definitely living two lives. One on the East Coast, and one on the West.

So here I am in Raleigh-Durham Airport with my usual Bruegger’s Asiago bagel with plain cream cheese and black coffee, waiting to fly once again to San Francisco; back to the Curtsy Headquarters where the other half of my life takes place.

 

 

I always thought I was an adventurous person; someone who could go anywhere on a whim and try any new place once. But after studying abroad in Italy, and later packing everything and moving to Atlanta after graduation, I realized one thing: I love my home. I love Raleigh. I love my family. I love my friends. I even love the North Carolina weather (call me crazy, because here it certainly is).

Queue: Working remotely for Curtsy HQ. This opportunity gives me the chance to love my home and also love California. It’s a complete challenge to my personality to be living 3,000 miles away from my office in San Francisco, California. Granted, working remote means working 3 hours ahead of the office and lots of video calls, but it also means traveling to an incredible city to work with awesome people each month.

There isn’t anything better than waking up, going downstairs to make breakfast and then walking three steps into the office each morning. In Raleigh, my ‘office’ is the desk in my room or a coffee shop downtown. In San Francisco, it’s at HQ with six other people (that I also live with while I’m there), two blocks from the bay and the Golden Gate Bridge. Each day at lunch, I go for a run either along the bridge over Falls Lake or along the bay in San Francisco. Either way, they’re pretty hard views to beat. And at the end of the workday, I get to try a trendy new restaurant in California or cook a delicious meal with my friends, boyfriend or family in Raleigh. Talk about the dream job.

 

 

Living 3,000 miles away from my office allows me to continue educating myself with more than just work every day. I am constantly learning new ways to better myself, how to become a better traveler, becoming comfortable in situations I usually am extremely uncomfortable in, and smaller things like time management. Working from home means that I can hang out with my dog during my work day, but it also means that I have to make sure I’m doing my job without the supervision I always thought I would have. It has allowed me to become an independent person, confident that the work I am doing is having an impact on an entire company.

But this is more than just a job. It’s a career working with a startup on top of working from home, which means that I am completely changing the way I live my life. We are working to create a community of girls that help one another, and that’s exactly how we choose to live here at Curtsy HQ. Every day we encourage each other, challenge each other, and inspire each other to be the best versions of ourselves for this company, and I couldn’t be more grateful that they took a chance for me to be a part of this journey, even from 3,000 miles away.

So thank you Curtsy, for giving me two families and two homes. You’ve been nothing short of spectacular, and it’s only the beginning.